GHOST HUNTERS

Get yourself in the mood for tomorrow and zombie-tize a picture of at Make Me Zombie Tomorrow, we have an enormous event in the blog world for all people who adore all things zombie. There will be movie reviews, poems, short stories, short films, giveaways, all kinds of sweet stuff--all of it ZOMBIE stuff! I call it the Blogger Virtual Zombie Walk because all you have to do is come onto my blog and see my zombie post and then there will be a list of links. Click on the next blog on the list and "walk" over there to see their posting, then the next on the list and the next. There are over 50 participants this year and their creativity blows my mind away. I've seen some of the stuff beforehand and I'm so honored to be a part of this event! So, be sure you jump on tomorrow and enjoy yourself. We'll be leaving the posts up all day so if you have to do it in the evening, you can jump on and have fun. Thanks ahead of time for jumping on board this event. You might win s...

(above-sprinklers) (above-moth and dust) (above-fingertip nearby) (above-hairs) (above-dust shaken from a feather duster) (above-cold breath) (above-camera strap) All I can say is, take the time to try your camera out with flash under lots of circumstances so that you begin to recognize what you camera does under certain circumstances. When I hunt, I wear a finger flashlight that is a velcro ring with a little flashlight on it. It's really helpful, but I have to be careful to wear it on my left hand. Why, you ask? Because one night, I had it on the right hand and every time I clicked the camera button, hairs caught in the velcro from me running my hands through my hair, dangled in front of the lens and created amazingly cool "shooting things" in all the shots. I remove camera straps too, just so it's never an issue. Never take pictures while walking and don't take any pictures until everyone has settled in for a while and hasn't been stirring up carpet dust, r...

( "Kaw" I actually really liked this one! ) Admittedly, sometimes Syfy confuses us: Are Syfy Original Movies serious or hilarious? Why do they give shows like "Haunted Collector" and "Mary Knows Best" a shot? Perhaps the programming is sometimes off, but when it's on, it's freaking magic! Examples--the first 3 seasons of "Ghost Hunters," Seasons 2 and onward of "Destination Truth." They also never forget us at Halloween-time, bless their twisted hearts! Last year most channels were pretty lame-o on the horror stuff. Not Syfy. They remember us every October with nonstop horror movies! Here's just some of the gems this October. In other words, if you keep it on Syfy, you're likely to not miss a good horror movie, a bad horror movie, or an often watched horror movie. You will get your fill, I promise--these are only a FEW they're offering: "Children of the Corn" "The Pumpkin Karver" "My Bloody V...

Cox Cable is just miserable in every single way. They did manage to talk me into digital and it makes zero logical sense. I've had it for months and just found the Biography channel recently. There's over 1000 channels and about 850 of them, I don't get and about 150 of the ones I get suck. Unless I sit there with the tiny card and study it avidly, even with color coding, I have no idea what channels I have until I sit there and go through every fucking channel! Anyway, the way the set it up for us folks with basic tier is that our channels are all over the fucking place. Could they put basic tier as channels 1-150? Nope! They spread them around. Well, when I found Biography, it was a number I remembered! First, I ran into the show " I Survived...Beyond and Back " which is a mesmerizing storytelling show about people with near-death experiences and the stories are amazing! I cannot stop watching it and it leaves me feeling good and hopeful and intrigued. It is one...

On a funny note, with the BF hunt coming up, I made the team homemade Bigfoot footprint marshmallows to put in their hot cocoa. I'm officially an UBER DORK! Tonight, I'm heading over to a talk given by a crypto dude talking about AZ Bigfoot and since in a few days I'm heading on a BF expedition in AZ, I figured--what great timing! Now, I'm contemplating the object of my obsession. Seriously, I think it's bordering on stalking Bigfoot. Perhaps I need a boyfriend! Well, anyways, I thought I'd repost a theory of mine. Enjoy! Okay, so maybe I spend too much time contemplating weird things. I mentioned this theory to a dear friend in the field of BF hunting and he seemed to be pleased with the notion, so maybe I wasn't too off the mark. Is Bigfoot a Berry Crack Whore? It started out with me seeing a show where monkeys were stealing beers from local diners somewhere in the world. Can't recall where, but I'll take a wild stab it might have been India or In...

I get a huge number of people lamenting to me that they quit watching "Ghost Hunters" about season 3, 4, 5.... Let's dissect the carcass that "Ghost Hunters" has become and figure out the disease process. The premise of the show went something like this, " a couple of average work-a-day plumbers have a secret life at night, chasing down paranormal phenomena in search of answers. They are so possessed by this mission that they've parked a trailer out front for their team to work in and pissed away the kids' college funds much to their wives' irritation. " Cause of death: Boredom, routine. The show likely would have survived had it changed and adapted, but instead they brought in celebrities for ghost hunts and shifted around their team way too many times. Ultimately, it was the repetition of their hunts that began to take on a very stale feel. We can all predict that any given season the will go to a theater and a museum, a house and an his...

**3 DAYS UNTIL THE BLOGGER VIRTUAL ZOMBIE WALK EVENT**

Seriously, a chilly rainy day with these playing nonstop, a warm blanket, some hot tea on a fancy tray with cookies--sounds like a dream day off to me! The dependence on gothic, moody, atmospheric locations and the use of black and white film made these horror movies the ones to cut your teeth on. As children, the stringed instruments, drums and piano all made us tense up in anticipation, but nothing nasty gory every occurred. To this day, I still love running these back to back and here are some of the best of the best for mood and atmosphere.... "Castle of Blood" with the scream queen Barbara Steele, this Edgar Allen Poe story takes on a very moody feel and is totally satisfying: How about Lon Chaney in "The Wolf Man"? Vincent Price in "House of Wax" "The House on Haunted Hill" "Psycho" Boris Karloff "The Mummy" Also, look for: Edgar Allen Poe Vincent Price Boris Karloff Lon Chaney Christopher Lee Alfred Hitchcock Bela Legos...

Should anything happen to me, blame The Human. The Human put me back in my Halloween fucking-humiliating pajamas again. It's her way of putting me in my place every autumn. This year, I'm not feeling the confidence I did before. The first October, I totally ruled the roost. Last October, she got Skittles the Clown to guard me and it ended up that The Human and I had to team up against the spooky dude. This fall, however, I see a certain stubbornness in her eyes and you know what redheads are like! I can't pull one over on her yet. Oh, a little prank here and there, but she laughs them off! It's like nothing scares her anymore. If she wasn't a human, I'd suspect she was possessed by a doll's heart. I noticed she's watching horror movies nonstop again (it's that time of year), so I was thinking maybe I could get some good ideas from the movies. Tell me, what movie do you think was particularly scary from a human perspective? "Dead Silence,"...

So, Stella and Liz (Julie and I) are going to do a zombie walk in our characters from our upcoming book "Zombie Housewives of the Apocalypse." It's happening downtown here on October 28th. We will videotape and photograph us and the event. We will be dressing in 1950s bowling outfits with pink shirts with our names and book logo on them, bowling bags and teased hair, leggings, and bowling shoes. We also plan to get some shots of us bowling with severed heads and inside of WalMart because we think we should end up on the people of WalMart site. We will take you along with us and I am excited to be knocking this off my bucket list. I've always wanted to do a zombie walk! Yahoo--I get to do Liz's makeup again! My character is the drunken divorced slut, so I'm not sure if her stiff-legged walk will be a zombie walk, or a drunken stumble.... We're still looking for the right publisher for this project. We could have advertised during the zombie walk if we knew ...

First, I'll tell you how I did this zombie makeup: Take Elmer's Glue or liquid fake skin and use a Q-tip and apply it to your face and make some gloppy and thick areas where there will be wounds. Let it dry complete. Now, take purple eye shadow and use a sponge to pat it around in spots around the face to make mottling. Next, mix black and white face makeup to make gray and sponge that all over the face, patting it on so the purple remains seen through it like splotchiness. Take the purple and work some bruising under the eyes. Peel back some of the flesh so it dangles and then put more gray makeup under it where your naked skin is exposed. When you want to do a wound, use a toothpick to dig a hole into the fake skin and take a black eyeliner pencil and draw a dark area deep inside the wound to give it depth. If you want to add bruising, use purple in the center, green around it and then yellow on the outer edge. Take fake blood and put it in a straw or the cap of the bottle an...

"Race With the Devil" "Wicker Man" "Bay Cove" Imagine for a moment that Hollywood did a bunch of movies portraying Jews as eating children or raping neighbors. It's not going to happen, is it? Well, why then does it seem okay to pick on Pagans and those who perform witchcraft? There has been such a corruption of the concept of an entire religion that it's staining everyone's viewpoint. Popular culture, such as Hollywood's portrayal of a religion, can greatly color those who are uneducated about it. Just remember what fundamentalists did to color most people's views of Muslims and Mormons. Now, let me clear up a few things: Witches are not like 1970s movies who perform sacrifices and worship the devil--they do not even have a devil in their concept. The pentacle is not an evil sign, but if inverted ( turned upside down ) it has been used to represent bad things, just as the cross upside down is used for the same purpose--a corruption of ...

Come on, get brave enough! Grab a loved one or some friends and plan a night out at a haunted attraction. They are in every city in the US. Some have amazing themes that seriously promise to freak people out. I personally do not like the saw-mill type attractions with loud sounds and tons of blood and knives. It just doesn't do it for me, but there should be attraction for everyone everywhere. Let's look at just some. And, find ones in your area, here. Best of list from Haunt World includes: Bates Motel & Haunted Hayride and Pennhurst Asylum Haunted Attraction in Philadelphia, PA Pennsylvania: The Bates Motel Haunted House & Hayride is a unique haunted attraction for several reasons: The Haunted Hayride is located deep in a 200-year-old forest full of overgrown trees creating the ultimate dark trail even during a full moon. This puts customers on edge even before ever entering the first hayride scene. Combined with a digital custom soundtrack, pyrotechnics and conti...

Lon Chaney, "Phantom of the Opera" "Nightmare on Elm Street" "Halloween" "The Shining" "Friday the 13th" If you were crafty and patient, what movie would you like to carve into a Jack O' Lantern? 5 DAYS UNTIL THE BLOGGER VIRTUAL ZOMBIE WALK EVENT ONLINE!

"Night of the Living Dead" Best storyline/plot for a zombie movie . It was the ultimate--a band of stray people shoring themselves up inside a farm house, unsure what in the hell was happening outside and having their own internal conflicts amongst them. It simply was the best zombie tale. "Dead Snow" Best most over the top zombie battle ever! It just doesn't get better than minions of nazi zombies that can't be killed and a scene of white snow and men with only a few makeshift weapons. Damn! When you think it's reached its peak--it goes a bit further! "Dawn of the Dead" (remake) Most threatening zombies . These zombies are fast and serious about their jobs! "Fido" The most stylish zombie film ever. It does bring together the 1950s attitude with the new zombie reality. It's funny, cute, and I just love it! "Shaun of the Dead" Best characters in a zombie movie . I just love them all, the mother, the stepdad, the friend...

In Morlocks, premiering Saturday, September 24, at 9PM (ET/PT), a scientist creates a time traveling device that transports people into a desolate future overrun by lethal humanoids, the Morlocks. Unfortunately, the creatures figure out how to transport themselves back into present day, triggering a race against time between human and humanoid. Starring Hewlett and Picardo, Morlocks is a production of UFO Films. Seriously, if y'all are a bunch of MST 3000 fans and love watching a movie so bad it's good, this sounds wonderful. Syfy seriously pumps out the best of the worst. Let's have some fun tonight!

Thanks Cliff from my favorite show, "Finding Bigfoot" for the awesome post on his fantastic BF site . Great guy! Hey, I'm in tonight and hanging out watching the shows on Travel Channel. Hang with me and drop in and say "hi."

Zak tells us, it's time for another season! Disturbed "Down With the Sickness" First off, there's a new show called "Dead Files" is on after "Ghost Adventures." I'm very intrigued by the premise of this show. A retired detective and a psychic communicator go to a haunted farmhouse in NY separately. Each does their own investigation and then they compare notes. I really like this idea. Hope they can pull it off. Tonight Zak and the Boyz go to-- Ashmore Estates, Illinois Built during WWI era, this building housed indigents and those with mental deficiencies. As many as 200 died there. The place is open to the ghost hunting public and is quite the attraction. The drinking game rules remain the same this season: 1. Stay home. 2. Take a drink for every time they say "bro," "dude," "man" and every time Zak thinks he was touched by a ghost and every time Aaron's mouth drops open in horror. Tonight's drink? Since...

It's Autumn! Merry Mabon, Awesome Autumn, Fabulous Fall. This is my idea of Autumn porn ( though I suspect many of my readers thought it was going to be something all together different! ) These beautiful leaves below were photographed by a talented blogger, Bubba . Candy corn, sweet and dense upon my tongue, making my saliva glands go wild, as I suck on it slowly and savor the reward. Naked bodies writhing in front of the fireplace, stretched out, heated thoroughly inside and out, flickering golden light against smooth skin and wet lips .... Tang against the tongue, hot mix of cider and rum, creating warmth in the groin and weakness in the legs, dizzy and pleasant, agreeable and aroused. ... Hidden amongst the headstones, the only sign of life, two bodies clutching in the chill frosty air, groping beneath sweaters, peeling back blue jeans, finding a twilight titillation before they are caught... . Are you getting aroused yet? Let's try some more hard-core autumn porn.... Snick...

"Mysterious Monsters" Narrated by Peter Graves. Mid 1970s. This was released in the theater. I remember. I went to see it. It actually scared me and spawned yet another Bigfoot hunt in the woods around my home. The film quality is rough, but it's actually very cool for recreations and some BF stories you've never heard before. Sometimes, the older stories get lost for the newer ones with witnesses with fresh memories. We are led to believe Peter Graves is in search of proof that sings to him. He wants to believe in the creature, but he'd like to hear from scientists and even a psychometrist who (if there is no prompting for his read was exceptionally good). Honestly, I love this one! I just love to hear stories I haven't heard over and over again. "Bigfoot Lives" Tom Biscardi. I know I'll get reamed for even mentioning this one. I think it's worth a watch, but not a buying! Don't let this Barnum and Bailey yahoo profit from it. It is hi...

Want some more? Here you go --

Another theater ( yawn ) Taking Maddie the dog with them ( New star of the show. Apparently, to their thinking, get rid of a female from the team - Kris, replace her with a new bitch ). I get why they use Maddie, but the fact is that she's the most exciting thing to join the cast since the KII meter conversations began and the conversations with an unscrewed flashlight. I'm actually going to break down and watch this Paranormal Witness episode because its about Bigfoot and y'all know I can't get enough of the BF!

It's quiz time again, my dearies. Count your a's, b's, c's and d's and scroll down to find out what costume might be ideal for you at Halloween. 1. I pride myself on the social skills of... a. Silently staring down people and making them uncomfortable b. Ignoring folks I don't want to deal with. c. Charming what I want out of folks. d. Being current and up on trends. 2. I think Halloween costume parties are... a. For unsettling people. b. For horrifying people. c. For living out fantasies. d. For having some laughs. 3. In a workplace situation, I tend to... a. Laugh things off, joke around. b. Remain invisible, anonymous, quiet. c. Enjoy chatting and flirting. d. Work to get status and attention. 4. When it comes to zombie movies, I really enjoyed most... a. Shaun of the Dead. b. Night of the Living Dead. c. Dawn of the Dead. d. Zombieland. 5. At a Halloween party I most want to... a. Be anonymous. b. Get into character. c. Charm guests. d. Pickup the opposite s...

( I kinda feel like this about the Halloween issue of Martha Stewart--The Halloween Issue Is Out--Oh My God) I still say Martha Stewart seriously needs to get laid, but every Halloween I do appreciate the magazine her talented staff puts out. It's on the shelves now and here's a teaser.... A werewolf-inspired food spread with full-moon quesadillas and mauled cider - Coffin cake, anyone? A freaky cool cemetery There are lots of costume, home decoration/haunt ideas and tons of recipes. There is a recipe spread for a dark tales stormy night supper and plenty of pumpkin ideas for carving. I have to admit, I think I have every Halloween issue. I put them on my coffee table in September and flip through them. It's just too much fun! Now, all I gotta find is a man who likes Halloween as much as i do and I can start making little ghostie treats and having horror movie nights!

On a happier note, had fun at Spirit Halloween again! Here's guy costumes I find sexy! If I had a date on Halloween--I would so totally wear this! Clowns are evil!

Some of y'all are new to my LAUGH series. See the tab at the top that says "LAUGH Comedy Series." I make loving fun of all the paranormal shows. Today, I decided that I am so in love with the show "Finding Bigfoot" that it begs to be poked fun at by an adoring fan. ( In the woods in the Cascades in Washington State, the team gathers in the darkened forest to look for the elusive Bigfoot creature reported by locals on the mountainside ) RANAE: Man, I'm really glad to be here in my home state on what might be a really awesome hunt. Matt: ( Turning to Cliff ) Did you hear something? Cliff: You mean Ranae speaking? Matt: ( frowns ) Ranae? Cliff: ( prompts ) You know, the female on the team. ( seeing Matt's blank stare, he adds ) The skeptic. Matt: ( bristles ) Oh, her. Bobo: What do you want us to do, huh? Ranae: If these people said that the creature was as tall as that row of branches down the hillside, perhaps we should have Bobo go down there and...

**WARNING--THIS IS GRAPHIC** There is a Russian drug called "Krokodil" that is a synthetic homemade opiate many times more powerful than heroin. You think the drug biz is a disgusting thing--this is as bad as it gets. It not only makes the mind into a zombie, but it also eats the flesh of the user. Photographs of late-stage krokodil addicts are disturbing in the extreme. Flesh goes grey and peels away to leave bones exposed. People literally rot to death. Scary, huh? Sometimes, real life is much more horrifying than fiction.

Step 1. Elmer's glue. Glob it on where you want the wound. You can use a blow dryer. It might take 10-20 minutes to dry well enough to work with. Step 2. Take face foundation in skin color and a sponge and pat it on the Elmer's until it matches with your skin. Step 3. Dig into the glue with a toothpick or pencil and open up a pocket for the wound. Now, use a black eyeliner pencil to make a dark area deep inside there for depth. Step 4. Take eyeshadow in purple and sponge it in close to the wound. Then, sponge green eyeshadow around that and then yellow around the outer area. Step 5. Put fake blood in a cap and gently pour it into the wound pocket and let it drip and dry. Step 6. Add instrument of torture into the fake skin, a nail, a metal nail file, or other object. **Be ready, tomorrow is a new episode of LAUGH, this time poking fun at "Finding Bigfoot.**

I'm intrigued by NDEs (near-death experiences). My father had one when I was 16. It was days before he died the final time. He had a heart attack and was dead for over 4 minutes when the paramedics brought him back with the paddles. As they rolled him out, he told me that he was on a fiord (he came from Norway) and his family was there and there were colors that don't exist and flowers that don't exist. That stuck with me for decades. Synesthesia is basically a confusion of senses in the brain. For some people with synesthesia, they can smell colors, see numbers as colors, hear shapes, or other variations. What is intriguing about it is that we consider these to be internal wiring issues. We don't usually see psychic skills that way, but people who say that the number 6 is yellow are truly messed up in the head, right? Perhaps, just perhaps, they are seeing things in a dimensional way that we as humans in this 3D world here in this living experience cannot conceptualiz...